A Man's World
by Platinum Dragoness
Summary: What if the senshi had been turned evil instead of the shitennou. Multiple pairings, most of them anime or PGSM cannon


Title: A Man's World  
**Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon**  
Theme: if only the senshi had been turned evil instead of the shitennou  
Version: Anime/PGSM

Mamoru woke up from the same stupid dream he'd been having every night of a lady—a princess, his mind supplied—in white. Just stress over his genetics test later that day, he told himself.

Folding up his futon, he slid open the door and went to join his roommate Motoki and Hina, who had been spending the night. Swiping some of the omelet in the frying pan he started to eat.

His adopted sister was giving him a curious look. "What?"

"Didn't you have a test today?"

"Yeah."

"And didn't you say you were going to turn in your biochemistry lab report in person before that?"

"Oh shit. Bye," Mamoru called as he ran for the door. He tore down the stairs and down the streets… tripping over a small black cat.

"Sorry kitty but I'm late," he said as he picked himself up.

"Quite alright. You're just the person I was looking for," said the cat.

"Ah! A talking cat!"

"I am Luna. I was sent forward in time to find the reincarnations of the Prince of Earth and his Shitennou by Queen Serenity. She was only able to seal away the demon Metallia and her corrupted Senshi and youma and the seal must have weakened to almost nothing for me to have been awakened."

"Look talking cat, I have no idea what you're talking about or what store you're a robot promoting. I'm late."

Mamoru took off running again and didn't even pay any mind to the stupid junior high school girl who knocked into him.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"Why would that monster--youma--be impersonating the manager of the Crown arcade?"

"Stop philosophizing and fight. Your friend's in danger."

"But I don't know how," Mamoru said desperately as the youma backed Motoki into a corner.

"You figured out how to transform into Tuxedo Kamen on your own," Luna said unhelpfully.

Mamoru's mind wasn't a blank it was just quickly going through useless information and images. His multiplication tables, hyperglycemia, a pretty rose garden…

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"So," Mamoru said in conclusion, "you're not all youma, you're just human bike gangsters."

"Right," said the orange-dyed-haired girl.

"And you are one of the Shitennou."

"Evidentially, whatever that is. What were those weird clothes I was wearing earlier, as Jadeite?" asked Jay Daito.

"Earth Kingdom guardsman uniform," supplied Luna dismissively.

"And you are a member of this gang," Mamoru continued of the half-American, half-Japanese blond.

"Of course not. He's a guy. He's just my boyfriend."

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Masato. And good to have found Nephrite. Sorry for thinking your girlfriend was Sailor Moon."

"It's not like you accused her of something bad, so I'm not offended. That Sailor Moon really does show up in the lick of time to save you."

Mamoru coughed. "Uh, yeah, she does."

"I wonder what happened to Naru's friend."

"That annoying odango-headed girl?" Mamoru asked with a scowl.

"She must have run off in the confusion. Naru will be worried if we don't find her, come on."

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Mamoru cursed into his beer at three thirty in the morning without slowing up.

"Oh come on it couldn't have been that bad," Luna scolded.

"First I'm fighting youma so late I miss the last train so I'm stuck in Shinjuku unless I want to walk back to Juuban."

"You could have taken a taxi."

"So I end up getting a drink by the station while deciding what to do and this pretty girl I meet offers to share a motel room's cost with me."

"There's your problem. Well, besides being underage to drink. You should have turned her down."

"I'm an eighteen-year-old male. I could no sooner turn her down as stop relying on oxygen for survival."

"Then…"

"Then it turns out she was actually a he and then there's another youma attack and she, I mean he, is actually Zoisite."

"You found the third Shitennou and fought off Sailor Jupiter and no one's seen Sailor Mars in weeks. I'd call it a successful night."

"Arg!"

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"I'm so sorry to trouble you. Thank you so much for finding my friend's turtle."

"It's quite alright," Shin told Mamoru, Motoki, and Yukio.

Motoki gushed over his turtle how he was never to run away again and Yukio eyed the man they had just met critically before deciding on a "Hey, sexy."

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"It's a real adult love, like you and Hina or your new friends at college, Jay and his girlfriend or Masato and Naru or Yukio and Shin."

"I'm sure those are all really bad examples," Mamoru told Motoki. Not that there was anything exactly wrong with his friends being gay or dating junior high or high school aged girls. "Just try to be a little careful. I think she might be bad news."

"Just because Kino-san is tall and a little scary looking? Give her the benefit of the doubt, Mamoru."

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"We should be safe here."

"What did you do back there Makoto?" Motoki asked from the park bench she had left him on.

"I have to tell you, my real name's not Kino Makoto. I'm Sailor Jupiter and I belong to the Dark Kingdom."

Motoki took this is stride. "Well do Dark Kingdomers get Sundays off? I'm not letting you off on those chocolate parfaits you promised me."

"How touching," said the mocking voice of Sailor Mercury from behind two of her youma.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

"He abandoned you. He was betrothed to you then he ran off with that Sailor Moon, just like he did to me back in the Silver Millennium," Beryl whispered in Hina's ear, her sole remaining Senshi, Sailor Venus, lurking in the background. "Don't you want revenge on that bitch?"

"Yes," she said, the dark weight of Queen Metallia's magic in her voice.

mmmmmmmmmmmm

"Hina! I know I'm not a prince but I love you so please, stop being evil. I once loved Jupiter just like you loved Mamoru but after she died I didn't take a vow to never love again and I've fallen in love with you."

"Mo-to-ki." She pasued. "I remember now, a little," she said in a whisper. "Oh Motoki I'm so sorry for you too. I'm not a Senshi, not really, but I think I've come to care for you. I wish I'd seen it all earlier."

Sailor Moon gasped as the Silver Crystal was formed together from their mingled tears. Tuxedo Kamen was still thinking tiredly. _Oh great. My sister runs off with my roommate when I'm the one who's supposed to marry her and inherit everything. I can't wait till her father finds out; somehow this will be all my fault._


End file.
